So I met Yinka during one of the interviews I attended while in search for a job sometime ago.

She was so desperate and in a rush. It was glaring and written all over her.

Eventually, we both were not picked.
She was devastated.

I remember she shared with me about the pressure from home and a lot she was going through. She was driven by a need to catch up.

"Akeju, I had lost a number of years. So I want to overturn those years I'd wasted."

"But you need to be patient . This phase is normal; and we all have to go through one or two phases before we eventually 'hit it'. So we keep trying!"

"Akeju, Now is the time I need to catch up or never."

"Now?!"

"Yes!"

I remember "Catching up" was her word.

Some weeks later.
I rang her, so as to check on her.

I was surprised when she told me she was already working in that same company we both were not picked.

"How come? When?" These are questions I asked.

She just smiled.

"You can't understand"

Later, that same night. I urged her to tell me how she'd find her way into that organization.

Then she told me, one of the key interviewers proposed she meet him for lunch in a hotel in Marina. Which she went.

That was how she got the job. She didn't give me details.

She said to me,

"Akeju, what are you talking about?!
N7million annual pay and a good official car with other benefits.

Just tell me, you are not happy for me."

"Well, I am. Just want you to take things slowly"

After that day, we never get to converse again. I would ring her but she won't pick.

Then there was this day she sent me a text after she had seen my missed calls.
She was in the hospital. In critical condition. I was stunned!

I paid her a visit. Her appearance had changed.

She looked old.

She told me,

"Akeju! Guess my age."

I said, "40"

She looked at me, "Akeju, I am just approaching 34."
But she looked 40.

She spoke with so much pain and regret.

"I Paid the price i needed not to pay."

That was all she had to say repeatedly.

Her health was deteriorated. Coupled with marital woes.

Money does not bring happiness.
It does not bring fulfillment.
Money is a good thing. But it doesn't answer all things.

Following, I saw her obituary. Her heart had packed up.

I got hit with the news of her demise. While I had many thoughts going through my head.

Life!!!

Are you also trying by all means to catch up or in a haste?

Slow down.
Don't be in a hurry.
You're going to burn out.
You'll get to the place you do not want to go.

Take it one day at a time. Give your all and be hopeful.

Work to live.
Don't live to work.
No one wins the race that way. Ask those who'd gone before.

We all, will get there in time.

Aspire for the best and for the top.
But not at the detriment of your life.

Your life don’t worth the exchange.

Do not because of today, burn out.

Do. Not. Burn. Out!

© Oluwanishola Akeju

"Marry the man that buys you bananas.

I know that sounds weird.

Why bananas? Why not a man that buys you flowers? Or jewelry?

I will tell you why.

Because when you’ve been married for a while, you go through a lot of stuff together. And sometimes that stuff can make or break you.

Circumstances that test your patience and things that test your love.

Not things that test how much you love, but how you give your love. Your time. Yourself.

Marriage is a partnership. It’s a see-saw. If both people aren’t moving together, it doesn’t work. There are sacrifices you must make. There is understanding and patience and acceptance. A lot it acceptance.

Accepting the differences between you, accepting that you will do the same thing in different ways, accepting of one another’s habits and quirks and little nuances that can sometimes drive you crazy and accepting that you are each unique individuals with your own strengths and weaknesses, talents and gifts.

And with acceptance, comes unconditional love. And that is the love upon which families are built.

Like many families, we are in the thick of it right now. Three kids under the age of eight with a decent gap between the oldest and youngest.

Between school, sports, therapy for our middle child on the spectrum and everything else in between, my husband and I are spread thin.

We are both running on empty. We haven’t had a date night in months and our evenings usually consist of a quick kitchen clean up and early turn in for bed.

I sent my husband a grocery list for his ride home because the day was tough and I didn’t get a chance to go. About forty minutes later I realized we were out of bananas. I called him to ask if he could grab them.

'Are you sure we don’t have any?' his voice sounded tired.
'No,' I snapped back feeling upset he would even ask that. 'Please don’t forget them before you check out.'

By the time he got home it was later than I anticipated. The kids were wild and I was mentally spent and frustrated by his delay. He came in with the groceries but the bananas were in a different store bag.

'Why are there two different bags?' I asked him.

'I was already checked out when you called. I wanted to get home early because I know you had a tough day. So I had to make another stop because I know we needed them.'

And that’s when my anger subsided and my guilt set in for getting frustrated with him. I gave him a hug and with a kiss on the forehead, we didn’t need to speak the words…he knew I was sorry and I knew he had forgiven me.

You see, every night my son on the spectrum has a banana. It’s just part of his routine. So to be out of bananas causes utter meltdowns. My husband knows this. So he made the extra stop.

He made the extra stop because he loves and he cares. And our ways of loving and caring may be different at times, but that’s what makes us a team. And over the years, we’ve learned to accept this in one another.

Marriage isn’t just about flowers and grand gestures. Marriage is so much more than that. Marriage is weathering storms together, big storms.

It’s being a shoulder to cry on when a parent dies. It’s hand holding in silence on the couch after a long day. It’s about finding a way to connect, even if that connection is a simple smile from across the room.

And sometimes, marriage is about buying the bananas.

So marry the man that goes out of his way for you. The one that still opens your car door and acts like a gentleman. The one that shows you in his own way how much he loves you. The one that tries to surprise you by coming home from work early because you’ve had a tough day, even though his was equally tough.

Marry the man that buys you bananas. I promise you that you won’t be disappointed."

Credit: New Adventures in Motherhood

The image of the child musician crying was classified as one of the most emotional photographs of modern history.

This photo was taken of a 12-year-old Brazilian boy (Diego Frazzo Turkato), playing the violin at the funeral of his teacher who rescued him from the environment of poverty and crime in which he lived.

In this image, humanity speaks with the strongest voice in the world:
"Cultivate love and kindness in a child to sow the seeds of compassion. And only then you will build a great civilization, a great nation”.

Guys let's get our YouTube channel (YT: africanbooth) to 6k subscribers. Kindly click on the link to subscribe 🙏 https://www.youtube.com/channe....l/UCRtIhfmXxrYHs6eWc

Book Review "Carol Dweks Mindset"
why did I not know this years ago? Oh my Goodness!!!!

Listen up, folks of 2023. This is a long read and not for anyone, again if you are 45 years or younger, you fit waka, but my most loved folks likes to "know" by reading and manipulating their already held views about life, we 50 and above are rejuvenating our brains and trying to become successful as long as our brains and hearts are functional, we no dey slack, we are growing into health success in all areas. This is a long read.

One of the most influential discoveries of the decade is knowing we can grow into anything we want. I used to think that only those 6 feet tall could be CEOs and big business leaders, only Igbos could trade and be successful, Fulanis only could have animal farms, and Yorubas alone could work a white-collar jobs, become professors or successful bankers. Little did I know I was thinking wrong. See me oo I used to think that Only more brilliant and younger brains can write software codes or build fully interactive web assets. At 50 years and above, my friend learned and writes codes and funny he is about to exit a 5m dollar web startup.

Let me formally introduce this groundbreaking discovery laid out expertly by a darling and wonderful author in her book "Mindset" Carol Dweck, a prof and slow-talking expert on human psychology.

Bros them and Sist them Buy this book and consume all of it.

Please do not joke with your mindset; it unlocks the most significant potential that can grow you no matter your age. Just believe it after reading this book.

Carol Dweck's book "Mindset" offers a wealth of valuable insights, but here are some of the most impactful ones:

1. The power of beliefs: Dweck explains how our beliefs about our abilities and potential can greatly impact our actions and outcomes. Those with a growth mindset believe that their abilities can be developed through hard work and perseverance, while those with a fixed mindset believe that their abilities are set in stone.

2. The impact of praise: Dweck explores the impact of praise on motivation and performance. Praising someone for their effort and hard work can foster a growth mindset and increase motivation, while praising someone solely for their natural abilities can reinforce a fixed mindset and discourage effort.

3. The importance of challenges: Those with a growth mindset embrace challenges as opportunities for growth, while those with a fixed mindset see challenges as threats to their abilities. Dweck shows how embracing challenges and viewing failures as opportunities for growth can lead to greater success.

4. The role of mindset in achievement: Dweck's research demonstrates that a growth mindset is a key predictor of success in academics, sports, and other areas of life. By developing a growth mindset, individuals can achieve their full potential and reach their goals.

5. The impact of mindset on resilience: A growth mindset enables individuals to bounce back from setbacks and failures, while a fixed mindset can lead to discouragement and giving up in the face of challenges.

Overall, "Mindset" provides powerful insights into the role of mindset in shaping our lives and offers practical strategies for developing a growth mindset and reaching our full potential.

"Mindset" by Carol Dweck is a must-read for anyone looking to unlock their full potential and achieve their goals. This groundbreaking book delves into the difference between a fixed mindset and a growth mindset, and how our beliefs about our abilities can shape our lives. Dweck's research and insights will inspire you to embrace a growth mindset and believe in the power of hard work and perseverance to achieve success. This book is a game-changer, providing practical tools and strategies to help you overcome obstacles and reach your goals. Don't miss out on the opportunity to transform your life – buy "Mindset" today!

Carol Dweck, Ph. D. Book is responsible for many changed habits

Book review by
Ernest Nnagbo

What do you do when you have to wash clothes every day but you can’t afford a washing machine? You go ahead and invent one of your own.

At least that’s what Remya Jose from Kerala did when she was just 14. Tired of washing clothes by hand every day, the young innovator went ahead and invented the washing-cum-exercise machine that uses pedalling, as opposed to electricity, to wash and dry the clothes.

Not only can the machine wash close to three kilos of clothes at a time, the clothes even come out 80% dry, saving both time and energy.

She has since gone on to win the national award for this feat and now works at the National Innovation Foundation in Ahmedabad, using her innovative skills to produce many more such machines.